Sunday, April 7

This boy left on a...well...not a jet plane.

Thank you SO MUCH for allowing some massive time away from the blog - but now that he's been gone enough time for me to get settled into, "So this is what deployment feels like?", I need to work on my LL Cool J skills...

That's right...MAKIN' A COMEBACK.

So hey, you, right there. How have you been? Have you enjoyed the lack of reading of shitty tales, drunken fables, and nights of eff-bombs? WELL I HOPE SO! Because this time we're trying to make a full-fledge'd comeback.

First off...


Phew. I got that outta the way. Nothing ever says happiness like Mrs. Wookie dropping bombs.

Oh, and that whole "This is what deployment feels like" shit....well it's just enough to keep me on edge with a semi-fervor butthole. Every couple days Murphy likes to rear her head and be like, "Bazinga!" but without the awkward giggle of Sheldon Cooper. Because that shit would never happen with Mr. Wookie around.

But let's get to re-know me better, since it's been awhile. I'm like a re-virgin'd blogger.

1. My childhood nickname was "Trashley." Yeah, then I changed schools. They barely graduated high school. I went to college...and finished. They have 3 kids, live in a trailer, and hate their life. I'm awesome. Boom.
Sucks to be them.
2. If you want to spoil me rotten, buy me a gold chain on deployment for my natural sapphire pendant that you got me for Christmas.
Mr. Wookie, ^^^ make it happpen! You read this blog on the boat. :)
3. The television character I most identify with is Robin from HIMYM with her career drive and love for suits, steaks, strippers, and rollin' with Barney, mixed with Lily since she's an actual Ginger and also met a boy in college who just wouldn't go away. ;)
4. If I had a whole day to go shopping and money to spend, I would go to (ready???)....
Can you take a guess why? Oh right, I have an inseam that competes with an elephant's penis. That's why!!
5. The most wild and crazy thing I have ever done (that I can admit to publicly) is "acquired" a tiara and dozen roses that just happened to not have any owners in an establishment where beverages are served. Don't just leaaaave your shit lying around for hours. Someone will enjoy wearing it and being asked, "OMG, is this your bachelorette????????????????????" <multiple question marks necessary
No. Though if I say 'yes,' will you buy my friends a round of drinks??
Scheming new move while all the boys are deployed for free drinks. Hmmmm...
6. The one thing on my bucket list that I am most eager to do is 1.) Buy a house. 2.) Go to Scotland with Mr. Wookie. Both TBD in 2014/2015.
7. My family will always be loyal to fighting for the "trust fund." It's a bogus joke where all the kids try to out-hustle each other for top rank in the parents' saving account. Who doesn't want to be the "family favorite?"
8. If I could spend a day with a celebrity I would choose Zoey Deschanel.
9. In my opinion, the best invention in the history of the world is the tampon.
10. When life hands me lemons, I make a vodka tonic. Duhhh!


  1. I think #5 is the boat oar story. I'm so pissed I wasn't there to witness that IRL. Hahaha to #9.

  2. Bahaha, @Baby Sister, #5 is NOT the boat oar story. :) I just plain stole that from a friend's house and didn't give it back before he moved.

    The tiara and roses are a level of shame/awesomeness that beats the boat oar by 1,000 camels...because it was in public. :D

  3. Welcome back :) If you need some topic inspiration (or a distraction from whatever "Murphy" has thrown you this week), I gave you an illustrious award on my blog.

  4. Welcome back. Although it seems weird to say welcome back while your other half is gone. Maybe that's just me. Regardless... bring on the stories. I, for one, certainly missed them.

  5. Yay for the comeback! Boo for deployment. LOL for your get-to-know-me top 10. Love it!