Thongs, Alarm Clocks, and Slurpees...oh my!

So what does it take to find thongs in Medford? Apparently 4 different stores in the mall. Figuring I could take advantage of my JCPenney charge card, I head to their lingerie department in search of some boring, nude thongs for work.

Goooood lord, the amount of granny panties that exist. I'm not talking the full-cheekal, wedgie-proof comfie ones that go under jeans. I'm talking the up-to-your-ribs granny panties. JCPenney had 2 brands of thongs...2...dos...II. That's just sad.

Same story at Kohl's and Macy's. WTF people? Do people not see the need to hide panty lines by cleverly shoving them someplace else? Apparently the growing elderly population has overtaken the underoos department at every store.

Now, I know Sarah is thinking, "Hello, what about Victoria's Secret?"

Yes, good thought. But ever since they increased their "5 for $20" to "5 for $25," I just haven't been able to bite the bullet on the inflation of such little pieces of clothe.

So anyways, I venture into Vicky's to see what they have. :)

The clouds don't exactly part, but they do have some fabulously generic underoos that will work for work. I wasn't asking for the world. I never do. I just want things to go my way, that's all. :)

So I got 2 cream, 2 slate gray, and 1 black. "Ooooo, black panties....She's wants to have sex some day." (2 points if you name that movie!)

***

And in the fashion of a Ashley-the-Forgetful, I have this dreadful tendency to forget my phone at home. It's like missing a limb. I feel so disconnected with the world. I place the blame in the notion that I don't have an alarm clock steadily on my nightstand, so I use my phone. Well said phone is usually forgotten on said nightstand. So my next mission is to probably search for a cheap, lil alarm clock that can do my wake-ups justice. I'd prefer this guy otherwise known as Wook, but I'll settle for some soft music.

We'll see how that goes...

***

And as the sister of...well, Hayley, let's be honest. I've forgotten the ability of teenagers to have the brain capacity of fish. It was just after 8:30 this evening when Hayley planned on going out for Slurpees.

"I want a blue one!"

Well 8:30 turned into 9:00, which turned into 9:30...which...oh wait, my slurpee is here. It's 9:45. Are we serious?

So instead of wasting it, I enjoy it, consequently ruining my bedtime and my teeth.

Looks like I should put my order in a lot earlier next time.

***

And one more thing. I invite you to my next party. It's a pity party...for me...my nail to be exact. I chipped the thing yesterday morning while reaching for a spoon for my morning Cheerios.

"So why don't you fix it?"

My darn girl is on vacation...in Hawaii...my next appointment is not this weekend, but next. Oh, cheers. :)