Friday, October 15

Boo You, Bank of America

So I notice this pesky "Monthly Maintenance Fee" that landed in my account on my BIRTHDAY (yes, I just noticed it today.  It's not like I log into my account all that often lately.  Because it's not like I spend money...when I'm not bringing in the bacon).  But ummmmmm, hello, that's my $8.  WTF?  Go away.  I don't want you.  Do you know I could spend that $8 on produce!  Greedy sons of beezes.

Enter this phone conversation.........

[Me]: "Yea, Hi, I noticed this monthly maintenance fee and....I'm trying to figure out....WHY?"
[James]: Confirms blood type, last date of menstrual cycle, and astrological sign...
[Me]: t.w.i.d.l.e. t.h.u.m.b.s.
[James]: "Your account shows your direct deposit ended in July.  Direct deposit actually waives the monthly maintenance fee for your type of account."
[Me]: "Yes, we had to move CROSS-COUNTRY FOR THE MILITARY.  I had to leave my job, unfortunately."
[James]: (sounding quite peppy) "So how soon till you get this taken care of?"


[Me]: (awkward laugh, part wanting to cry because I KNOW THIS, buddy, and part thinking that this guy is a renob...did you not hear the military...the move...or the "had to quit my job") "I'm working on this."

Conclusion: I need to keep $1,500 in my checking AT ALL TIMES.  So I've temporarily moved $1,800 over to keep over the limit.  But for damn sure I'll be looking into BofA's eBanking account vs (what I have) the MyAccess account.  So if you're a BofA customer, and are in my boat [or will be], or just graduated from school (and have the college-type account - they WILL switch you over), NOW YOU KNOW!!

And yes, I got the fee waived.  Because I pleaded.  So much for him having a heart.  He must be too big-headed from having a job, and direct deposit,...that he doesn't know what it's like being the little people.  Let's hope he doesn't flip his car on the drive home.  Because karma can be a bitch.

It's past 5:00pm.  Time for a cocktail.  And hopefully more Dog, the Bounty Hunter.  Or Sister Wives.  And leftover soup for dinner.  Because I'm not in the mood to slave over the stove for just myself.  Boo me, and Bank of America.

Maybe this is the Earth's motivation to get me to use USAA.  (Yes, I know all the good things about USAA...Mr. Wookie's been a loyal user for years).  We'll see.

Edited to Add:

No, Bank of America, I do not appreciate your Google Ad after I JUST post about my anger with you.  Please go away.  Or if you're going to stay, make me a cocktail.  You owe me.  And rub my feet too.


  1. I used to have Bank of America and I hated it. Glad you got your money back!

  2. Bail on that whole BofA thing. I have USAA and I concur with Mr. Wookie that its the best bank ever. Here is the fee rate for your eBanking.
    "No monthly maintenance fee when you choose online paperless statements, and make your deposits and withdrawals online or by ATM, without a teller, otherwise the fee is $8.95 per month" (aka don't come into a branch, it will cost you 9 bucks).

  3. Yay for getting your money back. I hate BofA. I much prefer USAA. I think BofA just needed to jab your already bruised pride for having to deal with them. But I won't lie. I giggled when I say the edited in part.

  4. You are hilarious. I love it. But not B of A. I the opposite of love them.

  5. I'm agreeing with Mr. Wookie about USAA. They refund your ATM fees! The husband has a bad habit of using the ATM card at the least convenient times (like when the surcharge is $3-4) so that definitely comes in handy.

  6. Grrr! That sucks. Okay, are you obsessed with Sister Wives, too? I freaking love that show, although I want to smack that goofy grin off the husband's face.

  7. I have "My Access" as well and luckily also direct deposit. If you go to a teller they charge you 2 bucks. It's kinda bogus, but all banks are alike. They get you with the fees somehow. If they don't, then they don't have as many ATMs as BofA which is just as bad since they'll charge you for using someone else's. Bah!